Friday, September 28, 2007

So, the ultrasound revealed unto us many interesting aspects of the fetus, to include knobby little knees, wiggly little brain, robustly-pumping chambers of the heart and, notably, incontrovertible evidence of gender.

it's a...
it's a...
it's a PATRIARCH! a baby patriarch! (and trust me, if the state of my stomach is any indication, he's already oppressing at a fifth grade level.)

(once again, I shame the matriarchy.)

So our old pal Bimbo dropped by to say hello, and I showed her the blurry little ultrasound picture which, I'm told, clearly reveals evidence of predestination-of-oppressor-status, and she went "Yay! have you thought about a name?"

Well, yeah, I says. we still like Wolfgang. it's non-negotiable, according to the Patriarch-in-chief.

"So, what about a middle name?" she asked. she had some helpful suggestions:

"Caine, Joseph, Angus, Edgar, Huck, Horatio, Hieronymous?"

"eh," I says.

then she gets a little quiet. she smiles. she goes -

"I've got it. it's perfect.

"Wolfgang Patriarchy."

"See, that way," she says, "anytime something breaks, you can say 'I blame the Patriarchy! go to your room!', and when he says 'that's not fair', you can say 'I said, Go to your room! I'm oppressing the Patriarchy!'"

Genius, thy name is Bimbo.

Or, you could name him Nigel. ;)

Btw... congrats!
Nigel Patriarchy.


and thanks!
Wolfgang Nigel has a ring too it.

I actually really LIKE the name Wolfgang. Well, I have a cousin named Wolfgang (wolfgang angvar, actually...with a suitably germanic last name, too) and he's always been a favorite cousin...funny kid, good at rugby, loves chocolate.

AND I am sure your wee patriarch will be awesome and cool and all that other good stuff too.
+ One Billion points to you.

you guys, it wasn't me. it was Bimbo.

I just made the fetus. she made the joke.
YAY for BOYS! Boys ROCK! Yes they do!

You know what this means? It means YOU get to be the AntiQueen of the house. Because let me tell you, whoever is the primary female, is the one who actually rules things.
Hey! That was going to be Abbie's name if she was a boy!

The Wolfgang part. Not the Patriarchy part.

Congrats. And get some Weeblocks.
vanessa - that does seem handy.

Rootie - thanks for the vote-of-confidence, but I was thinking I might just pass him off to our pal know, so much healthier for Class Woman and all if I just refuse to nurse my male neonate...

or, you know, just possibly put even a half-assed amount of effort into raising a human being instead of a total tool.
AP, congrats! That's amazing news! Little Wolf will be the anti-patriarch, based on your fine example.
I agree with Octogalore, that "Little Wolf will be the anti-patriarch, based on your fine example."

Because looking at where the kid will be raised and the family the kid will have...lil' Wolf will be very anti-patriarchy.

Diane says the middle name should be Robert after the late great Grandpa Parsons or I say Amadeus.

See you guys some time, Diane says call.
Coolness, AP! Wolfie is one lucky dude.

So I'm assuming anytime I get pissed off I can just go ahead and blame it on your son, right?
absolutely, ravenm. that's what Patriarchy's there for. and he probably did it too... ;)


that so totally wins.
Wolfgang Nigel does have a REALLY nice ring to it!
Well, at least you don't have to breastfeed him now. All those extra IQ points would be wasted on Patriarchy.
why bother to feed him at all? or wash him? or anything?

then again, there might be one good reason to fatten him up. I'm sure I have a copy of Jonathan Swift's Down-Home Family Cookbook around here somewhere...

of course, then I'd have to change the name of the blog to "I Eat the Patriarchy."
It's a moot point anyhow... I distinctly remember you promising your first-born son to J. in exchange for a small favor 20 years back. ;)
she's welcome to him, but only if she promises to eat him.

Wolfgang Jupiter.

Well, probably too much for New England, but he'd be made a quarterback here in the south with a name like that!
that's cool, Daisy!

Wolfgang Gravity, as suggested by my husband.
I didn't find anything that seemed tasty in Swift's Down-Home Family Cookbook. Anyone have a copy of To Serve Man?

(I am such a mean mommy.)
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