Friday, September 08, 2006

someone's in the kitchen with Dinah, and Sage, and Jean:

says Sage:

Okay, ladies, Jean, over at You Are Here is calling for orgasm-precipitating recipes. I hope she meant that literally, because here's mine! (Gosh, I'll be so embarrassed if it's just a euphemism for really good recipes.)

and this is all funny because I collect cookbooks. Old cookbooks, ethnic cookbooks, obscure-ingredient cookbooks, advercookbooks (the Campbells Soup cookbook, the Pillsbury cookbook, etc.) - I really dig them.

Imagine the diversity of the Orgasm Cookbook...

Homestyle Orgasm
Barbecued Orgasm
Veggie Orgasm
Lentil Orgasm
Gluten-free Orgasm (with carob chips)
Orgasm Casserole
Orgasm a la King
Orgasm Surprise
Orgasm Creole
Orgasm Salad
Orgasm Like Mama Used To Make
Dad's Favorite Orgasm
Danish Orgasm
Sun-dried Orgasm with Tarragon
Orgasm Tetrazzini

How long 'til the Food Network gets hold of this?

I wanna be on Iron Chef: Orgasm! (well, who doesn't?)

cookbooks are literature and i need to write a book someday. "Reading the Cookbook" or "In the Kitchen with Foucault: Succulent food makes me cream my boy panties"

Actually, R thought the Sweet Potato Queens quote I used once was so funny, he bought me their cookbook. Never had time to read it though. He also came me something about "Cooking Nude". heh.

Couldn't get into that idea. I'd be covered in flour and probably burn my book with grease splatter or something.
I'm afraid of the orgasm puupuu platter. A big NO one that one, kids.
he gave me a book called "Cooking Nude" or something like that is what I meant to say.
Bitchlab at 10.07, me at 10.07 - and it probably took me just as long to type mine.
stop it
Orgasm Tartare, anyone?
somehow I'm not sure the Hell's Kitchen-style format would translate so well, though.
cheryl - you're a woman after my own heart...
Orgasm Creole: No crawfish involved, mehopes. I am TERRIFIED of those things.

Sun-dried Orgasm: Oooh... ouch.
book == boob? see why i call em slippage. my boobs are literature. and covered in grease splatter.
grease splatter and flour, my boobs are roux machines. heh.
how can a baltimorean be terrified of things that look like crabs?
No, they look like lobsters. only smaller and yuckier.

crabs look like food. crayfish look like...eeugh.
Crayfish: The head I don't like to gobble.

OH! That was such a bad one!
I'm sorry - I'll suck anything, but I draw the line at eyestalks.

boundaries, people!
The Vegetarian Orgasm book would have to be strictly for lesbians since there's no meat involved.

(sorry, I couldn't resist)
Betty Crocker's Orgasm.
I don't know, kactus. I don't have good luck with box mixes.

I prefer homemade orgasm, myself.
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