Wednesday, June 14, 2006

OK - it's true. I have nothing at all to say for myself. The best I can do is read the blogs of others and comment (in)appropriately.

Something's been bugging me over at The Den, and since my comments seem to get lost in moderation limbo, the best I can do is to discuss it here:

In a post dated Saturday, June 10, 2006, entitled Dubhe: Reluctancy, Purpose, and Sitemeter , Dubhe says, in reference to the rather explicitly foul search terms that have been used to find The Den:

The ones involving children have all been reported to that nasty "crypto-fascist organization"* known as the National Center for Missing and Exploited Children

*(and yes, that's a direct quote from a feminist who is also pro-kiddie-porn)

I have been hunting high and low for five days looking for this direct quote. I've been googling unto numbness and losing precious barely-physically-presentable-sleep. So far, I have not found a link. I suppose someone could have made this statement in print or on the radio or TV, in which case it would have been very handy to have provided some kind of reference to track down in the library. But as far as I can determine, someone has been misquoted, or taken wildly out of context, or simply misunderstood as a result of human error, typo, or some other hiccup of visual media technology.

Of course, it is possible that Dubhe's citation is merely purposeful hyperbole, repetition of malicious gossip, or straight-up fabrication.

But he's not that kind of guy - much as we may disagree, I am sure he's not a liar.

It is also possible (insofar as anything is possible) that there is just such an individual out there, who calls hirself a feminist, with a) just cause for thinking the NCMEC is a cryptofascist organization, and/or b) pro-child-pornography, whatever that means, and/or c) completely off hir head.

But I'll never be able to form an opinion without the means to read the original statement for myself.

Any thoughts?

wait, what? WHAT??

is the supposedly pro-kiddie-porn feminist named? because you know, in this day 'n' age, that's a pretty fucking serious charge.

istr Dubhe going on about nudist colonies being prone to attract kiddie molesters as well, which, I don't even know where to start, with that.
Okay, I looked at the post. My only thought is this:

That boy ain't right.

Sorry. I honestly don't think it bears much more analysis than that.
maybe it was from a private email or a conversation.

It's making me crazy (ok, crazier).
see - this is how things get out of hand. One day it's "a feminist who is also pro-kiddie-porn called NCMEC a crypto-fascist organization", then it's "sex-positive,pro-porn feminists are pro-child-pornography", then "pro-porn feminists are pedophiles", and then it's "Susie Bright eats babies."
Well, yes. And I still keep a beady eye on that sort of thing.

Then again, as a family friend once said, regarding her husband's remark about the food we'd served him (in response to her own, "It's delicious," he sez, "Chicken is chicken"):

"Consider the source."
I must say I am really loving the way those two's first inclination is to go Report To The Authorities whenever they get a search item they don't like .

which, first of all: you know, if it bothers you that much to look at them, have you considered not doing it anymore?

or perhaps that your own rather piquant language tends to attract such searches?

anyway, I'm sure whoever they're calling will care deeply that some random blogger is getting searches for "biting fetish" and "I was thrilled when my son touched my boobs" and whatever else (because of course these all must be taken COMPLETELY LITERALLY."

I mean, I expect they'll get right on that.

"But doc! You're the one showing me all the dirty pictures!"

froot. bat.
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
AntiP: E-mail me for the ref. I refuse to engage in a place where it's ok to call me and BB "froot bats" in spite of flaming and name-calling being against the rules.
with pleasure, and forthwith.

please, just stop the spinning in my head!
And Jesus! Inspired, I check my stats, and someone hit me looking for naked Fairly Oddparents pictures! To the Po-lice.

*not really*
totally OT - Jean, do you watch The Wire?
I was about to say, before the cable connection knocked out on me again (if it's not this, it's that), that I apologize to antiprincess if it is my rudeness which is preventing Dubhe from posting here; and I will scribble the offending post if you desire.

That said, I will add that my own rudeness and potential double standards regarding thus notwithstanding, it really is a particularly loaded and nasty charge to make against someone, "pro-kiddie-porn," and if that "crypto-fascist" remark is enough to identify the feminist in question to anyone, frankly, I think that is a pretty damn weaselly way of calling her/him/hir out.
closer to on topic - how do you get those stats?

I swear, you should have to get a license to blog, to prevent hammersacks like me from running around blogging like there's no tomorrow without knowing what we're doing.
antip, you do know what you're doing. I have faith in you.

I understand what you want to do here, I think, and it really is none of my business, I expect, but--damn, it kind of tears me up when you put yourself down like that.
pardon me - I meant hammersacks like US.

and, according to none other than the Esteemed and Highly Regarded Bitch/Lab,

"Most people running blogs are dumb asses — technologically speaking."

I watch 'The Wire' when I can, indeed. Takes the sting out of 'Homicide' not running as long as it should have.
jean - my husband gets all cranky with me when we watch The Wire, because I'm all "there's the domino sugar sign! that's gotta be Hampden! Is that Highlandtown? The inner harbor does NOT look like that! OMG the Hippo! See that corner, right there? I lived there/ate there/hung out there/don't remember what happened there!"

it gets distracting, apparently. can't imagine why...
It's a vicious cycle, ya know... the more one uses a particular word or phrase on their blog - whether they are endorsing it or being appalled by it - they only serve to increase their blog's Google ranking for that search term.

So, I guess BB's place is on its way to being the premiere kiddie porn one-stop-shop.

And, antip -

One day it's "a feminist who is also pro-kiddie-porn called NCMEC a crypto-fascist organization", then it's "sex-positive,pro-porn feminists are pro-child-pornography", then "pro-porn feminists are pedophiles", and then it's "Susie Bright eats babies."

Ha! Hilarious - and sadly true.
antip -

Easiest way to get your stats on a blogspot blog is to sign up for a free tracker such as Statcounter, SiteMeter, or MyBlogLog and drop in the javascript into your template.
Yeah, Statcounter was pretty staightforward, I found. Sitemeter I tried but couldn't get to work.

Hey, Hon: You know you're home when you see the Domino's Sugar sign.
my friend Judy and I used to sit up on Federal Hill and watch the full moon come so close you could touch it.
Oh...Fed Hill...truly awesome. Still one of my favorite spots. Lots of memories.
closer to on topic - how do you get those stats?
Easiest way for a blogspot blog or other nonhosted site is to sign up with Sitemeter and put the little Sitemeter icon on your template.

How that works is that every time somebody views those images, the information about that user is recorded -- the IP address can be used to see where (geographically) the user is, or even what company they're coming from, what browser and OS they're using, and (important for this situation) the referrer, or what link they followed to reach your site.

If you want, you can look at my blogstats to see what they look like. If you notice the URL is from Google or another search engine, you can determine the query terms by what comes after the question mark (or by viewing the detail page for that hit -- click the number at the start of that line).
Now, this will change by the time *you* look at the stats (unless you're having 5:30 am insomnia), but I see things like:
where to purchase garanimals, poetry in motion, feminist analysis of gone with the wind, how do you feel about eating meat, scent of woman scenario, ellen kushner fanfiction, my cubicle it doesn't have a view it's my small space, "he flirted with her" sex... and so on.

One of the things about blogs and search engines is that there are often a lot of unrelated posts on the same webpage. So, I will get hits for (to take one memorable example), Caesar Brutus slash. That's because I happened to write about the play Julius Caesar the same week I wrote something about slash fiction. Not that I've written anything (much) about slashing Shakespeare characters.

One other fun thing about watching site stats is witnessing ego-surfing. If you write enough about books, you may get hits from people Googling on an author's name. Look closely at the details, and these often come from the city where the author is known to live. They don't often leave comments, but they are looking...

The fact that Sitemeter works by showing the images does mean that you can browse somewhat more stealthily if you turn images off on your browser (easier done on Firefox or Opera than IE) or use a text-only browser like Lynx. This *isn't* foolproof. Because my blog is on my own site, I have access to the actual server logs and can see a bit more. I get the same info about browser and referral, though I have to look up info on the IP address from someplace like

If you want/need help putting a sitemeter doohickey on your blog, let me know and I'd be willing to help with the template stuff...

I swear, you should have to get a license to blog, to prevent hammersacks like me from running around blogging like there's no tomorrow without knowing what we're doing.
Nonsense! and don't insult yourself. Blogs are just tools, just formats. If you can write, you should be able to blog. People can and do get fancy on their sites, but at its heart, there's nothing complex about blogging and you shouldn't let it threaten you. [And if you're really feeling insecure, the average age of Livejournal users is 18, and I can easily find you some illiterate tweener blogs to enable you to feel superior.] You've got great things to say, and I enjoy reading them.
thanks, Lis. the tech help is much appreciated.

I gotta say, there are so many days where I feel just too intimidated to open my mouth. (but why let that stop me?)

but "hammersack?" so much fun to say. just rolls off the tongue.

OT: How was your anniversary?
OT: How was your anniversary?

Pretty good. Ob-jay interview-way I shouldn't write about from work.
And last night, we went to an astonishingly good local restaurant for their Chef's Whim menu (only served Weds and Sundays, thus the day's delay in dining out). Six courses of what the chef wishes to serve, with no choice on the diner's part but wines and mentioning dietary restrictions. Wow. Sometime today, Ian's going to blog up what we ate...

BTW, I'd love to hear more about your "cookbook/housework history collection" I find that kind of thing fascinating, getting a look at how everyday people used to live.
Just weighing in to agree with belledame:

if it bothers you that much to look at them, have you considered not doing it anymore?

That said, I did enjoy outing the folks who were coming to my blog looking for nude pictures of reality show asshat, Slade Smiley, so perhaps I shouldn't talk.

And AP, I only figured out the stats thing like 2 or 3 months ago and I've been blogging since last August.
Good point, EL.

I didn't add Sitemeter to my blog until shortly before my two year bloggiversary.
Caesar/Brutus slash! HA! awesome.
EL: but did you call in THE MAN to take care of their slimy ass?

(who's Slade Smiley?)
Caesar/Brutus slash! HA! awesome.

After that time, I discovered the existence of a bard_slash LiveJournal community, so hopefully that searcher either got their fix or learned there was no competition so wrote hir own.
My God, Lis, that restaurant sounds amazing.
we have one of those "chef's whim" style restaurants nearby. it's housed in a cramped, nasty, scummy little diner - but the food is top-drawer delicious. Breakfast came garnished with an orchid - an ORCHID! jeez!

O'Roarke's in Middletown, CT - come visit me and we'll go there. we'll have to go early (like 6AM) cuz the line wraps around the block.
My God, Lis, that restaurant sounds amazing.
It was.

Middletown, CT - come visit me and we'll go there.
How close is that to New Haven?
I intend to attend this exhibit at the Yale Center for British Art sometime soon...
if you're coming from Massachusetts (that is, north of me) and wanting to go to New Haven (that is, south of me), I think you might have to go through Middletown anyway...but before you got there you'd pass right by my exit on the highway, if you're car-enabled...

Yale Center for British Art is insane. They have all kinds of great stuff. Highly Recommended.
East Coast blogger road trip/meetup! (I didn't know you were in CT, antip)
an intriguing thought, this east coast meetup of which you speak.

Hartford is so NOT a fun town. New Haven might be cool. but Noo Yawk and Bawstin are also nice. then there's Bawlamer-hon which is my personal favorite...
BTW, last night, Ian blogged the meal.

Read it and drool.
his journal or mine (I recopied his verbatim with a few additional comments).

If we're thinking about a northeastern gettogether* (and mind you, my husband will be along so it won't be a total hen party), do either of you like Shakespeare? I do go out to Lenox a couple times a summer, and hey, Merry Wives is all about uppity broads getting their comeuppance!

*BL, if you're still reading this, I'm hoping to see you when I next visit my family that lives in your area.
lis - my husband is a one-man blue-collar shakespeare ARMY.

We'll have to figure something out.
Yeah, Hartford is...the term "hardcore industrial grunge" springs to mind. I mean, it's got a certain charm if you're into that sort of thing I suppose. I knew one guy who was, but he was awfully Teutonic and dour; not my bag.

New Haven has its points, but having lived and gone to school there for three years, I have a sort of gut horror of the place.

But I'll meet y'all wherever you want to meet: good company outshines the grimmest setting.

personally, I think we should go somewhere where we can get CRABS AND BEER.

*is* there anywhere north of Baltimore?
nope. not really. maybe Wilmington, DE. That's a fun town. Oh, and Philadelphia. Also fun.

How far is Philly from NY, hours-wise (by train, say)?

(and if two trains running leave at the same time--no, no, not that, goddamit)
Philly... take a picture of the Liberty Bell and photoshop a certain blogger profile getting gonged underneath it.
"do not ask for whom the troll bells..."
it trolls for thee.
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